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Friday, November 5, 2010

A Special Dance

This morning started out a little yucky for me. After getting ready for the day, I looked in the mirror and looked gross. I've been feeling fine emotionally, but the physical side of things has caught up with me. My face is breaking out more than it has in years, my hair is getting stringy and feels dirty, and I'm just starting to look sick. I know it's VERY important to take care of myself, I just honestly don't think about that part of me as much. I've talked with a few people and hopefully they will all start to hold me accountable! Now, that I've written it on here, I have a lot more people to join in! ;) I know that I need to be healthy to take care of Cale the way that I want and need to, and Rachel pointed out that God calls us to take care of our bodies. It's just not so easy to do it as it is to say it. I also know that I'm not as far off the wagon as I felt this morning, but it's definitely time to change something!!

As soon as I finally got myself to the hospital, Cale was just finishing up with Neuro Psych. Dr. Howe had some really exciting news for me! Every day that he has psych, Dr. Howe will say three different words, have him say them, and then have him point to the objects. After 2 minutes, she'll ask Cale to say the three words. He has never been able to repeat them. If we give clues, prompt him, or give him multiple choice, he's sometimes able to pick out what they were. This morning, she first asked him to pick the three words this time. Cale (while counting with his fingers) said I-don't-know. Dr. Howe said she laughed so hard and thought it was so great that Cale was using humor in that way! haha! She said they couldn't use those words, instead, they used book, tree, and water. After two minutes went by, Dr. Howe asked Cale what the words were. Cale said "I don't know", "Well, think about it" she encouraged him and then he said "book, tree, water" Yes! Oh goodness! Yes! That was 2 minutes and the first time! When I walked in, Cale waved his arms got really excited and then Dr. Howe asked him again "What were the three words?" and Cale said "tree, water" It was 5 minutes after and he still got two of them! Thank you Jesus! Yes! Yes! I hugged Cale so tight and had a hard time letting go. This is such a huge thing!

In therapy's Cale is starting to get really frustrated when something is challenging and he can't master it (he was always like this!). Today in ST, Patty told him that he got hurt, but he's here to get better. Cale asked why and she asked him if he knows what part of him had gotten hurt. He said no, so she told him it was his brain. She asked if he knew how it had gotten hurt and he said "No, but I want to know!" She explained again about the car accident and thats why things can be so frustrating right now. Cale said "It's very very frustrating." I can't imagine what he feels! He knew how to do all of this and now it's so hard and takes so much out of him. He pushed through the whole session again!

In PT, we went from the elliptical yesterday, to the treadmill today! Earlier this week was the first time Cale was on the treadmill with out being hooked up to a big standing thing with belts (not sure how to describe it!), and it went ok, but was kind of a trial. Today when Pat got him on, he looked normal! He did so good! It wore him out, but he ended up doing the whole 10 minutes!

In a blog in June (click here to read ) I had written about how special dancing was for me. Tonight at family dinner, a jazz band came and played for all of us. They've come once before about a month ago, and I loved it, but after a little while, it was too much for Cale. Tonight, other than being tired, Cale was doing great and enjoying it so much. After we were both done eating, I got Cale out of the chair and we moved away from the tables and danced! He stood there swaying a little side to side, and every now and then would nudge me for a spin! It was so special and fun! The whole walk back to his room and while I got Cale ready for bed, I felt like a giddy girl again! :)

Us at Prom :)!!!!


  1. its sounds like a wonderful day.:)and as for yourtself you look great.dont let satan put doubt in your head.theres a book my mom lent me about how the bad thoughts arent ours there from satan and how to over come thinking that way.when i started to read it i thought about you and everything you guys are going through and thought it would be a good book for you to if your interested let me know.:)you will always be beautiful to me.its the inner beauty that makes the outter beauty look good.and you have a wonderful inner beauty.:)

  2. Kathleen!! ABSOLUTE ditto, to what Deb said. Satan would love to screw you up. He sees that you are standing strong with the One he hates. That doesn't sit well with him. Father has you and Cale in the palm of His hand. He isn't letting go. With a hug, Marion Hansen

  3. Kathleen,
    I told you a few months back that I also had TBI. It was in 2005. I was in therapy for 7 months. Mine was not nearly as serious as Cales. My damage is in the frontal lobe. I think it may be a bit of a blessing he cannot remember the details of how/who he was before the accident. I still struggle with depression as I know what I could do, compared to what I struggle with now. Balance, memory, writing, word finding, and stuttering are issues I sometimes deal with. Seems to be worse on days where I am tired, stressed, or feeling under the weather.
    Cale has made so much progress! It is huge that he feels SATISFACTION/PROUD of his accomplishments!
    I on the other hand, continually felt substandard, as I knew I was not doing as well as I had, before my accident. My damage is subtle to others, but not to me.
    I do understand his frustrations, but I am glad that he does not remember how much better he used to be.
    I really feel if he keeps pushing as hard as he does, and he keeps meeting his own goals, he will be able to surpass predictions.
    YOU, with your positive energy and LOVE for Cale is the best medicine for him!

    Lorri C

  4. A wise lady once gave me this little saying when I felt I was not doing well. "Use what you have, Do what you can, and leave the results to God." You are doing absolutely wonderful. God Bless you! Marilyn (A friend of Rachel's)


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