Friday, January 14, 2011
When I left Fisher House yesterday morning, this sunrise greeted me. :) It was perfect for the moment and what I was getting ready to enter into. The Lord gives me so many sweet kisses through my days that remind me of all His promises to us. This picture doesn't capture how beautiful it was!
When I first went in to see Cale, he was sleeping so I prayed for a couple minutes and then sat quietly in his cozy dark room. I knew it was going to be a long day and didn't want to disturb him. The nurse came in after a while, and wanted to start getting everything ready, so, I nicely asked if I could wake him up sweetly first. It was so great! Very special. Not too long after that, it all started! We got Cale all ready, helped him on the gurney, and off we went. I stayed with him as long as I could before they took him through the doors.
The waiting began. It wasn't too terrible, but waiting is never an easy thing. I spent some time reading the Bible, and soaking in God's love letters. The biggest thing was waiting to see where Cale was going to end up! Nobody knew if it was going to be ICU, another hospital room, or back to his room. Eric one of the nurses took the time and called to see what the game plan was, and as soon as we could get there, we did! I walked in his room and he smiled so big! He was very aware and in a fairly good mood. He wasn't too happy about the IV in his arm, but seemed pretty good.
Here's Cale giving a smile! Much different then the last ICU experience...thank you Lord!
After a short speech session, we passed the time away with playing cards. Cale had to lay completely flat for 6 hours, and of course wasn't easy! The last two hours I could tell he was starting to lose his cool. He was tired and hungry!
When he could finally sit up, we did communion with Chaplain Brady which was so special for me and meant a lot! It was such a blessing to get my heart in a place of true surrender. When there is any kind of sin in our lives, it causes a wall to be built, so to be able to knock that wall down, and check my heart for any fear, worry, doubt...it was perfect to start this step of faith in. Afterwards, it was time for dinner. The tray wasn't a favorite for Cale, but he ate the few bites of meat, jello, a fruit cup, and Ensure. He seemed satisfied when it was all gone. He was tired, so Kathy decided to say good night. I stayed with Cale for a bit more and then planned to leave soon after. I waited to hear from the nurse before I left, and then right as I was getting ready to walk away, I heard Cale coughing. Immediately I knew what was happening. I threw down my bags and got to him as quickly as possible to raise his head. He was throwing up. :( Poor guy.
After getting him cleaned up, I stepped out of ICU and gave Kathy a quick call to let her know I might not be coming back to the room. I also asked if she would update the blog, so everyone knew to be praying. I could tell it was going to be a long night. Cale's heart rate had already been pretty high for a while. It was staying in the 120's for most of the evening. When he threw up, it shot up and stayed around 135. I was feeling terrible for him and the nurse was calling ENT. They had already been watching his heart rate, but then he threw up. After a little longer, it was decided that he was probably dehydrated. They pumped him with fluids and around 1am his heart rate settled. I stayed for over an hour after I had planned on leaving and then finally decided that Cale was going to be sleeping through his surgery, but even if it was for a couple hours I should try to sleep. Kathy and I were awake at 4am and I headed to the hospital about 4:30am.
I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” Lamentations 3:19-24
Cale was awake and greeted me with another really big smile! They said he slept for about two hours, woke back up, and then slept again for another 2 hours. They did an EKG right after I had a minute of good morning cuddles, and then took some more blood. Everything was back on track. I'm so proud of him for how well he did. I know he was miserable, but he was managing to keep a really good attitude! Once Kathy was there, we were doing the waiting game again, wondering when they were going to come get him. I was pulling out some thinking games for him. ;) I started with asking him what rhymed with different words and then the last one, I said, "What rhymes with happy?" he gave me an answer and then we decided that was a hard one. Next I said, "What are other words that are like happy?" Cale said "joyful and funny" I said cheerful and Kathy said glad. It was Cale's turn and he said, "Kathleen" Then I asked, "What are some words that are opposite of happy?" Cale right after, with out any hesitation said, "Cale" I felt so bad for him!
It wasn't too much longer and the doctors were in, the ENT resident, and the Anesthesiologist came in and talked with us. After going through the list of things that may happen, all the risks, and things that we hope won't happen, the Anesthesiologist said he understood that having a talk about that kind of stuff isn't the most fun, but to think about it like when you get on the airplane and they have to go over everything in case something goes wrong with the plane. You hope that the flight is safe and you land like you're supposed to, but you want to be prepared if not. I really liked having him put it that way!
There's nothing easy about seeing Cale wheeled off. What is easy for me to do, is pray. That's the only thing I can do to help at this point. I'm so thankful that the Lord hear's me, loves him, and wants the best for us that will bring His name glory. When I can believe and trust in that, I feel a supernatural peace. It's amazing.
And then we wait.
The doctor had to mark on Cale's face so I said it was his war paint!
I love him :)
Right before he headed out!
Posted by Kathleen at 9:30 AM