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Monday, May 30, 2011

A day to be reminded...

Cale had speech this morning for the first time since leaving the hospital as inpatient. He did SO great! As I sat and watched him answer as best he could at each question, with a smile on his face, the tears of joy came! I couldn’t help it…

He did so much better with word finding then the last time he was tested. He still needed help with some, but she only had to give minimal cues. She also did some questions with memory and had him repeat words. He did fantastic at slowing down what he was saying to get it to come out clear. I’m just so excited for how well he did! It was such an encouraging session too. She talked at the end about how good it was that a lot of times, if given time Cale was able to come up with the word. I’m super excited to see how all of this therapy helps in Cale progressing and helping him enjoy life more.

I had one of those moments today where I got really frustrated trying to do something that normally Cale would do. He had set something up on the computer for me a few years ago, but I needed to make a new one. It took me triple the amount of time it would have him, but I did finally figure it out! I’m so often reminded in moments like that with how much Cale did for our family, and how little I knew about some things…like technology! I’m learning and trying though!

I want to share something that Cale had written on his last deployment to Afghanistan right before the accident…

Different things hit people in different ways. Some people cry when things happen to them, when they lose something or someone they know. Some people take things personal, whether it's their fault or not. I've always been the kind of person to not be too affected by things like that. I have noticed that I am more affected by other people's hurts, seeing my Girl crying, when my mom is sad, or maybe even a sad part in a movie where a character I like lost someone. I guess my empathy is stronger than my own hurt feelings.

We lost four good guys a couple days ago, and at first, I wasn't too broken over it. It sucked, I hated the fact that four young guys had to die for a war in a foreign country. I don't know their feelings over the war, if they wanted to be here or not. As people talk around here though, I hear more and more about what happened. One guy was 3 days from going on leave to his wife and kids, another was also married. I don't know about the personal life of the other 2, but one of them was my friend and I recalled his first day to 4-25. Thinking back, I see how much this is going to hurt their families. A wife and 2 kids, expecting their husband and Dad home for a fun filled vacation, instead, received word from an Army representative that he had been killed in an IED. Another wife received the same news. And either mothers or fathers are told that their sons were killed. This is when it struck me, sadness filling my head, not leaving, and almost paralyzing my thoughts at times. What it would be like to be riding in a humvee, pass your best friend in the turret, slapping a high five, and seconds later hearing an explosion that kills him. The four boys wouldn't have known what happened, sudden death, not the exciting kind.

Thinking of their families makes me want to cry, makes me want to somehow comfort them, but for this, there are no words. There is nothing to make this better. Nothing to bring back the lost for a final goodbye. I'm sorry for their platoon-mates, who I know had grown so close as people do over here. I'm sure they are struck by this. And their leaders, I know you would have done anything to save them, change this outcome. I'm sorry.

Finally, not to disrespect, I'm not looking for words of comfort for this in any way. I am simply wishing to display my condolences to the people involved.

R.I.P. Owens, Roughton, Pratt, and Lightfoot. Your War is over.
Written By, Caleb Darling
Thursday July 23, 2009

(I asked Cale about this picture earlier. He looked at it and immedietly said, "Yes, I took it." When I asked what it was of, he said, "Of soldiers that died to save our country.")

There are so many men and families that have sacrificed so much. We so quickly let today slip by with all the current shopping sales, the BBQ’s, and the day off of work, but we need to also remember the many families all over that spend today mourning for their loved one. There are also so many men that hide away today, that don’t want to talk to anyone because of the men that they have fought side by side with and lost to war. There are men that still battle depression, anger, suicidal thoughts, fear, and so many more things!

Here is a man that continues to suffer from severe TBI…

I’ve met Evan, and his mom and look up to both of them so much. Unlike Cale, Evan is still in the wheelchair and still unable to talk with his family. They are just one of the many families all over that will have lifetime effects from war.

Thank you to all the men that have been willing to serve their country and give so much of themselves!

Your unfailing love is better than life itself; how I praise you! Psalm 63:3


  1. Seeing what others have or don't have sure puts things in a different light. We are reminded to be thankful for the gifts Father has given us. Thank you for sharing. I love you, Marion

  2. Cale...

    A tremendous thank you to you, Cale, for all you've done for serving your country! God bless you and keep you. Love to both of you...


  3. Kathleen ! Powerfull words from a soldier! Thank you for sharing them. So glad you were able to see Caleb's improvements first hand - that is awesome! I keep praying that the Lord will continue to give you treasures while you are away. ((())) Happy Memorial Day... Always found it wierd to say Happy on a day like this, but the happy isn't in the loss of life but in the freedom that we have gained because of those that have given so much !!!! Reenie

  4. Beautiful. Thank you for sharing...both your heart and your husbands. And thank you for your service to our great country.


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