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Sunday, February 5, 2012

in a fog of joy.

I feel like the last few days preparing for this trip, have been very interesting in the way that my mind hasn’t fully been able to grasp what was about to take place. In many different areas and ways, this trip is making my head spin at the thought of what is really happening. In 2007 after Cale had been deployed for 16 months (14 months straight) we booked a trip and went on a cruise. We had the best time and if I remember right, I was in a bit of a head spinning time then as well! My soldier was home! ;)

This time all the memories of our last trip ran through my head yesterday like a slideshow of a thousand moments all collected and mushed together. Leading up to yesterday I felt a nagging of it like my mind was trying to prepare me and help me brace for the reality of the change, but it wasn’t that way as I woke up and prepared the last minute things in our suitcases, flew from stop to stop, or walked through each airport. This time it was more…like a fog of joy. I kept leaning over to Cale through each flight asking if he was going crazy like me, or if he could believe we were actually going on a cruise. In no way does he understand the extent of what this trip resembles; the very miracle that is unfolding as each minute passes.

Flight #1

End of Flight #2


To start the trip off, Cale thought he’d blow me away immediately! I had both of our bags to wheel into the airport along with our backpack and my purse. Cale stopped and grabbed his bag! I was a bit nervous because of his balance and him trying to pull a bag could end up…well, not good, but he did it! He wheeled the whole way to the counter to check in! Ahh! It was SO cool! It’s times like that when I want to announce to everyone around to look and see what he’s doing. It’s like I want everyone to share in our happy moment. You know what I mean?

We had several flight issues. It definitely wasn’t one of those smooth flights, but by the end of the night the hotel was there waiting! Cale did great (the best yet!) with the long day and all the flights! There were a few bumpy moments…and red faced Kathleen moments, but all in all I was really impressed! I love getting to compare events like flying because I can visually see a huge change. Was the last big flight when we went to NY? I think so. Anyways, either way, huge change compared to the last!

We’ve had some good laughs because of Cale as well! He’s a hoot! After our first flight, Cale and I were put in charge to watch all carry-ons as Mama and Janis made a visit to the ladies room. Janis has one of those neck pillows that Cale grabbed and stuck under his shirt! He kept saying he ate it! ;o) The funny part was that after Mama and Janis saw it, he kept it in his shirt as we walked to our gate! He had a huge smile and walked proudly! We were all laughing so hard! It didn’t take long for the walking motion to make it fall out, but it was fun while it lasted!

Do you remember when I wrote about the fast walking strip things (what are those called?) at the airport last time and how Cale loved them? Well, he still loves them and walks even faster! He uses my arm for a lot of support on them so after doing a couple in a row, my arm feels like it’s going to fall off! Haha! One of them was a double and we raced Janis. Cale with his long legs had no problem speeding ahead! He was pretty excited to step off and say he won. :o) I think we did four or five to get to our gate and by the end he had Gumby legs! I had to help him walk a little more than I usually need to. Fun!

At our stop for lunch, they had a little buffet style thing of peppers. Cale loves peppers! He picked out 2 pepperoncini, 2 slices jalapeño, and 2 slices of another spicy kind. He didn’t eat them until on the plane and after a few minutes he started yelling, “Hot! Cold! I don't know!” He had already finished his drink so to save him I gave him a package of fruit snacks…

Our other plane ride entertainment included, Crazy 8’s, Cribbage, iPad games (I had added a few cognitive games as well as fun), and making silly faces at each other.

On Friday we went to see Cale’s great grandma. Her birthday party was yesterday and since we were going to be plane hopping we were missing the party. To start off the grand visit, Cale was giving grandma a hug and fell on her. :o( I felt terrible. He felt terrible. Grandma was ok. Cale was ok. She’s spunky for being 97! Still…it wasn’t a good thing and thankfully neither of them had been hurt. From now on, hugs will me more closely monitored! Later on, we were talking about something else and grandma said, “Well, things happen and life keeps going on.” It’s a statement that I know so well. I think it had become a little part of our journey after the car accident and once I was out of my little ICU bubble, realizing that even though Cale’s life had just about stopped completely, everyone else had lives that just kept going. Babies were born, trips were made, weddings happened. I remember at one point when I had braved the idea of getting on Facebook again, I was only on it for a minute because one of the first posts had something to do with the person being so upset because the shopping trip for shoes had been unsuccessful. Scream.

But, that is real life. Life goes on. It’s a good thing. Having a bad day because of a bad shoe shopping trip is a blessing. While my life had been so consumed with every second of Cale’s progress and praising the Lord for every breath he was taking and for the intense wait for him to “wake up” it was easy to let myself think that my life had also stopped. It took me a while to understand and realize that my life had never stopped, in fact, Cale and I were living the life that only the Creator of the universe could knit together in such a way to create something so beautiful and intricate.

I am so blessed and grateful for the opportunity to take this trip and to know even a fraction of the depth and the amazing blessing of what this trip is. I don’t think I can STILL rap my head around it all!

Oh how sweet and precious is our Father’s love.

I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. -Ephesians 3:16-19


  1. That was so fun to read!! I hope you all have a wonderful time!!! I am so glad you had the opportunity to go...enjoy!!
    Praying for your safe travels,
    Emily Jordan

  2. WOW!! You already posted. I AM impressed. I wasn't expecting anything until you got back. I am kind of glad, though. Yes, life does go on. Even so, I don't get people who grip about a shoe-shopping trip going awry. If that's the worst theur life deals them....well....bully for them. Either they are walking around with their eyes closed OR they are making very small packages, all wrapped up in themselves. Did I just go on a rampage?!?!??? I am expecting even more fun moments for you all. I love you and rejoice with you in you getting to go on your cruise. Hi! to everyone with you and an extra BIG HI just for you, Marion

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